I’ve been feeling kind of down lately and my current flare up proves it. Stress is definitely a trigger for me and I almost had an accident a couple of days ago to prove it. Not really appealing at 31 years old but I digress lol
Whenever I’m down I’m not the most happy person to be around and I start to feel like I’m living in a fog and just frustrated with the world. Not really a pleasant feeling. I had a dream last night that featured my favorite uncle that passed away about 15 years ago. Wow . . didn’t realize it’s been so long. Growing up as an only child and raised by my single mother he was that one consistent positive, fun, male figure in my life until I was 16 when he passed. Since his death whenever I have a dream and he’s in it, I feel like it’s his way of saying hi. It might be silly to think so, but since it happens so rarely I almost vividly remember every dream I’ve seen him. I’m not the most religious person but I do believe in life after death and that we do have our own guardian angels. I have had an experience where I was crossing the street and I thought my friend was pushing me across, to look back and see my friend still on the other side of the street and the truck that almost hit me stopped. I was literally pushed and remember feeling fingers on my back, that more than anything convinced me that spirits exist.
So last night I had a dream and my uncle appeared, in past dreams I’ve never had a conversation with him, he was just talking to other family members, it was like a scene out of my life. For the first time in a dream I walked up to him and said “Hi, I miss you and if this is your way of saying hi, I thank you so much for doing this.” He just smiled and then I woke up. I cried for a good 10 minutes, it just seemed so real and I didn’t realize how much I’ve missed my uncle. 15 years later, I’ve realized losing a loved one is something you’ll never get over, but just learn how to live without them.
Even though I’ve been feeling down, I’m grateful to wake up and see another day. There are many days where life is so hard, especially when having good health is not always guaranteed, but life is also so very precious and its nice to know that I’m not always alone.
As always taking one day at a time and remaining hopeful.